Monday, December 26, 2011
ABC Starts Saturday
Friday, September 23, 2011
Alright then...
Fruit, crackers, whatever just SOMETHING.
I'm chill with that.
Monday, September 19, 2011
I'm hungry,
Sunday, September 18, 2011
I know I've said this before:
Tomorrow is the day.
Tomorrow I am fasting.
The whole day.
Tomorrow, I will come home and do 20 push ups (my arms are really weak).
Tomorrow I will come home and do 60-70 sit ups (which ever hurts and I can do).
Tomorrow....What else will I do right tomorrow?
Tomorrow, I will run.
Tomorrow, I will stretch.
Tomorrow, I will do loads of exercises.
And get my homework done.
Tonight, though, I'm getting sleep.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Tired food rant.
I'm sick of these days with high calorie counts.
Mom says that she won't buy food to cater to my diet choice.
Doesn't she get it?
I'm sick of feeling sick, so I'm changing my diet.
Also, it gives me reason to say no.
"Can't have it. Vegan."
There's some sense of respect you get from being vegan.
I don't get it either.
All of my calorie counts have been high recently.
I'm done with that.
I need a reason to say no.
"You want this?"
"Nu-uh. Vegan still."
Alright, 50 jumping jacks and then bed.
I'm FINALLY tired.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Some fries. A PB&J, some toast, some cheese
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
It didn't start today. Has to be tomorrow.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Being Sick is good?
Being sick makes me feel like puking when I eat.
So, being sick=good.
Is it just me or are these posts getting shorter and shorter?
Sam Lupin That day was not my day. Maybe, hopefully, tomorrow will be. I need to quit saying "tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow" Fasting gives me a wonderful feeling. I love it. So I need to quit saying tomorrow will be the day and just START NOW. :/
Saturday, September 10, 2011
TODAY. It HAS to start today.
I'm so fat that I've put it off for DAYS.
Not today. We're dress shopping tonight.
Homecoming is soon. Two weeks from today.
Today, I have to start my fasting.
School, home, out and about, whatever the challenge, I have to be stronger than that.
My period makes me gain weight, but one day, one day, I swear, when I get my period, I won't spring to 140, I'll go to one thirty, maybe one twenty-five.
I'm so tired of eating.
Kes: Good luck to you too! ^^
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Remember how I said I was going to not eat?
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Lately,
I've been awful with food.
But no more.
I'm not eating from now, September 6 at 7:28 PM until September 10 at 7 AM.
I will be exercising.
This is my revenge.
Chalks Isn't that so annoying? :/ I really, really don't like eating.
Monday, September 5, 2011
Hungry. Alll The Time.
I've noticed that I feel full after a while of not eating, but RIGHT AFTER eating, even, I feel hungry. It's so weird. I also can't tell when I'm full.
Breakfast is 140 calories. I mean yogurt with honey. No fat, though.
Compared to how I eat everything else (in a -let's-get-this-over-with fashion), this is taking me forever to eat.
Lately, I've been gaining weight. I can feel it. I was 138 in clothing, with boots on when I went to the doctor. Since then, I've been scared to weigh myself. But I'm thinking I should've fasted instead of eating the yogurt.
Maybe...I'll just start fasting after I eat the yogurt, no food for the rest of the day. I always plan fasts and then fail at them. I hate that.
Mom called me out on not eating a lot last night. I said, in the middle of a huge binge, probably, "I'm so hungry for no reason!" Her reply didn't concern my diet at all. "That's good, it's been a while since you were good and hungry." I'm hungry all the time, which I guess I hide well.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
I'm gonna try for liquids today
Unless it's like yesterday where my hunger pains did not register as hunger, just as pain. It was a weird sensation.
So, so far so good. Let's keep it that way.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Food sucks
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Ate like a blob today
Sorry, I had a rough day, even though it should've been easy.
I'm just...done eating for a while.
Quote from my therapist "Remember it's important to eat THREE meals a day."
My mom says that America is the only culture that does that.
She says there are some that eat five small meals a day, some that eat one BIG meal a day and snack when they're hungry, but America's the only one with three meals a day.
Mom's a nurse.
My therapist doesn't know a thing about food.
I feel like I know a lot about food. Just because...I have to. I mean, I put it into my body on a daily basis. I should know about it. Though most people don't care. They just fill their face.
Forgetting how food tastes. Forgetting I need it.
Starting tomorrow, I'm not eating for a while. I'll drink all the water in the house and then some if I have to.
Monday, August 22, 2011
School.
Brother's finishing a doughnut.
Look to see if there's any left.
None. Safe. Again.
Get the urge to eat the ancient food in my room.
Just tell myself how old it must be.
Safe. Again.
Didn't eat lunch.
Didn't have breakfast.
I'm running on fat and water.
The urge to eat is strong in this one.
But she won't give in. ^^
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Over the limits
Bad at dieting, I guess.
It can't be too far over my limits. They're pretty high limits. I'll be good now though.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Been Busy, sorry
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Keep messing up.
Day 5: 700 (used to be a fast)
Day 6: 500 (used to be 300)
Day 7: 600
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Food...
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Dieting!~
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Diet Plan!~
Friday, August 5, 2011
Today,
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Monday, August 1, 2011
This week, I'm staying under 600.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Yesterday DID NOT go as planned.
I...kinda really badly messed up. I think it was my first real binge. It was pretty bad. I was eating for the sake of eating. I had two slices of pizza, two poptarts, some Cheese Nips, and finally a granola bar.
I'm giving up on ABC, at least for now. I may try again later, when I'm back on my game, but with all of these mistakes so early into it, I'm pretty bummed.
Right now, we have Greek yogurt. It's really...fluffy. We got the vanilla kinda because Mom doesn't ever us yogurt in her cooking and the plain kind tastes like sour cream. For a cup of this vanilla kind it's 190 calories. We have a small container left over from when we were "trying" them and it's 127 (actually, 126 point six repeating). So totally my breakfast/really early morning snack. I dun know why I'm even up this early. It's a total epic fail.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Friday, July 29, 2011
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Fooodddd
Day 1: 500 calories (or less)
Day 2: 500 calories (or less)
3: 300 calories
4: 400 calories
5: 100 calories
6: 200 calories
7: 300 calories
8: 400 calories
9: 500 calories
10: Fast
11: 150 calories
12: 200 calories
13: 400 calories
14: 350 calories
15: 250 calories
16: 200 calories
17: Fast
18: 200 calories
19: 100 calories
20: Fast
21: 300 calories
22: 250 calories
23: 200 calories
24: 150 calories
25: 100 calories
26: 50 calories
27: 100 calories
28: 200 calories
29: 200 calories
30: 300 calories
31: 800 calories
32: Fast
33: 250 calories
34: 350 calories
35: 450 calories
36: Fast
37: 500 calories
38: 450 calories
39: 400 calories
40: 350 calories
41: 300 calories
42: 250 calories
43: 200 calories
44: 200 calories
45: 250 calories
46: 200 calories
47: 300 calories
48: 200 calories
49: 150 calories
50: Fast
This will take me until September to finish. I think I'll make a blog for it, tbh.
Americaneagle: Sorry I made you worry. I ended up eating a little and did feel better. Again, I'm really sorry I made you worry. In case you can't tell, I've become quite the mess, to the point I worry myself. I'll try to never pass out, just so that the both of us don't have to worry.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
I don't eat half of the day
Monday, July 25, 2011
Been up since 11
Weight is...129. Ugh! I'm stuck here. =( I hate being 129. I wanna be 120 and lower and lovely.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Anna's birthday I did GREAT
I did amazing for Anna's birthday. Yesterday, though, I had TWO pieces of cake. That's more than I had for Anna's birthday. We went to a concert and I had a soda! Regular soda! But I jumped until my knee started hurting. I should've bit through the pain and jumped around some more.
Anna's birthday... Was wow. I.M. didn't tell me to eat more than what I ate. I had hardly anything. A few bites of nasty, grilled tofu, some slices of grill zucinni, a bite of grilled green onion, some popcorn (with butter, ugh), and a few bites of icing.
Weight? I dunno.
Comments:
Kes: That's exactly what I did. Thank you for the advice! ^^ I also had two glasses of water really quickly together so I was fuller. If they had asked, I could have blamed it on a small stomach.
americaleagel: I had a fantastic time. Everyone was lovely and we went to see the new Harry Potter movie right after the party. I felt very loved and it wasn't even my party. Haha
Friday, July 22, 2011
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Fast
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Fat, Fat, FAT
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Zero
But I haven't gone out to my grandma's yet, so unless we go around six or seven in the evening, it's gonna be worse. A lot worse.
Weight this morning with my P.J.'s on was 135. I'm subtracting a pound because of clothing, bracelets, earrings, ect... So, we're going with 134.
My legs look thinner. Not since yesterday, but since I REALLY looked at them. I took a picture of them just to see if it was true.It is. They're not super thin, but they're thinner. Which is a start. Remember, you're working to look not like this.By the way, I did not wear those boots around today. Really think they're cute, but they look pretty winter-ish.
Lottie X: I actually had a wonderful day yesterday, just not...foodwise.
Kes: The markings on our scale are sooo tiny, so I can't really tell what it says without bending down, but then they change because I'm putting more pressure on it. See I'm usually the one getting other people's clothes. And I hate it. Haha
Edit: Ugh! Right after posting I go and eat 350 calories.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Wow
It's two-thirty.
I've been up since eleven-thirty.
I've brushed my teeth, washed my face, put on eyeliner, watched a TV special about Harry Potter (♥), found my favorite jacket, oh and not eaten.
Only drank part of a bottle of water, a full bottle of water, and two classes of coffee.
Feeling freaking great. Other than the music on the radio sucks and my little brother's using the other computer so I can't blast my ears out with great music. Oh and my headphones are dying so they block out sound, but sound like crap.
Huh, I kinda wonder where my Choir hoodie went.
Burn calories tearing my room apart looking for it? Sounds like a good idea. See, I love my choir hoodie. It's huge on me and really thick. Perfect for when I don't want to wear a coat in winter.
Only, I have no clue where it's wondered off to.
I knew I was forgetting something.
Weight this morning: 136/135. I couldn't really tell which. Of course, I'll be weighing myself later tonight.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
I'm an Idiot.
Can't be true.
Eating makes me sick. Almost literally. I went into the bathroom after eating a side salad, cherry pie, and drinking half a powerade/hi-c mix. Nearly got on my knees and made myself puke for the first time ever. But I didn't.
Calorie count was up at around 1040. Not "normal" but it will make me fat. Especially with how much sugar and fat stuff I had.
Monday, May 30, 2011
I think...
I'm going to eat what the call a "healthy" calorie amount. Which to me will be 1200. I'll still lose weight, not as fast, and it's healthier since I sit on my butt most of the time. I wanna be able to at least maintain my weight. All this is because I looked at my wrist for the past few weeks and thought "When did you get small?".
Guys, we're gorgeous. We just can't see it.
I wanna find someone who loves me and I wanna be able to do everything with them and not feel guilt.I wanna be alive and free.
Sorry if I'm disappointing someone, but this is my life and I'm running it the way I want. So I guess I'm not sorry.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Dropping the 0
Friday, May 27, 2011
Bad Day
We went to a buffet. Ugh. I had 3 plates, technically. One was all fruit. One was mainly noodles. The last one was three SMALL desserts. I'm guessing, with two technical meals, I had about the same a normal person has all day. UGH!!
Tomorrow is 800. Let's hope I can keep to this. If not, I'm doing a two day fast. Dizzy is not enough . I need to be low calorie.
So far, so good.
Danced off about 8 for a net of 222. Cute number.
I'm gonna weigh myself here in a minute for the contest I'm in!
Under 130, pleasee?
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Alex was weak
Tomorrow= first day of summer/400 calories.
I'll be stronger. I'll so it.
I will be strong
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Upset.
I posted all happy to have eaten so little...and then my mom got home and I felt "safe" so I ate.
Scale says 134.
Tried talking to one of my friends about this because sometimes I hate it. She doesn't understand. She's larger and happy. She's the person who makes the jokes, I'm the brat who lives them.
Purging came to mind while I was in the shower. Didn't do it because I'm sure everything's digested. This is starting to scare me because I can imagine purging.
But I've come so far...
Thank you all for the nice comments... I just wish I deserved them. Tomorrow I will! I'll be strong ALL day. ||ANONYMOUS||, americaneagle, and NeoHippie I will be worthy of comments about a good intake tomorrow!
Americaneagle, what store is that?! I want a cheap tank top!
Anonymous, this is how I feel about any diet: if you wanna, go for it. It's alright if you don't have time to. I just get a little lonely.
NeoHippie, Aw, I'm glad I make you less lonely! That's why I'm here!
210!~
Ate 210, burned 28.27 so far! SO FAR! I'm planning of doing more, of course. Wouldn't it be cool if I got down to a net of zero?
So, on most sites I go to for diet-planning say not to take money with you. Well, I say find out how a coffee, plain, is from a place near where you're going. Exact change, down to tax. That way you can caffeinate yourself, but not be tempted for much else. That's what I do, at least, when I'm out with friends. A small coffee from McDonald's, last time I got one, was 96 cents.
I have nine followers and none of you say anything. It's quite lonely. Then again, I don't give much for you to say anything about.
Oh! Alex is thinking of doing a 24680 diet. Meaning two hundred, four hundred, six hundred, eight hundred, ZERO! I'll start tomorrow! We get out for summer tomorrow, so it's PERFECT.
Americaneagle, sorry I didn't see your comment earlier! Anyway, I'm always really hard on myself when I have junk foods. They're generally the one thing that trips me up.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
Ate a little.
And ran half a mile in 4 minutes and thirty seconds.
Currently, I have a net of
Had coffee for breakfast, some rolls and chips for lunch,
Was gonna fast, but my teacher made lunch, so I felt it would be rude to decline.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Dunno how much I ate today, not enough to make the dizzies go away. Wish I had fasted. Tomorrow, maybe??
Asking Anna about cigarettes. Because she knows where to get some. And I don't see it, mentally, as bad as drinking. Drinking makes you gain weight, right? Smoking keeps you from wanting to eat.
I don't know my intake or how much I exercised. Did I exercise? The days kinda flow together.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Get up and Dance
I use most of my calories dancing. Just realized this. Maybe that's why my legs are more toned than my tummy.
Breakfast:
Water- zero.
Lunch:
Coffee- 0-2
Water- 0
Same as lunch
This is only a plan right now. Let's hope I can stick with it.
Exercise:
DANCING~ for AT LEAST 10 minutes
Working stummy for at least 4 minutes
And WiiFit for 20 minutes
Without the wiifit, this should burn 106. The wiifit will probably be another hundred, at least.
Sounds fun. Alright, I'm off to make my dance playlist! That way I won't have any drab, boring songs that I try dancing to.
Everything strike-out is my failures. I did six minutes dancing, worked my stummy for two minutes, didn't touch the wiifit, had 3 slices of cheese, a ninety calorie yogurt, 290 calories worth of cake, and 4 frozen cherries. About 673 taken in and only about sixty-eight burned. FAIL. Bad, bad, bad.
Friday, May 20, 2011
521
That's my calorie count. Yep, I broke my fast for....Cookies. Fail.
I did dance for about a minute while I was out tonight. Then I got home and danced to a few songs for about three minutes. Laziness. But I burned about... 26 calories.
This means I have a huge net of 495. Yep...
I'm gonna go do something to work my absss. Because my tummy looks ick.
Coffee For Breakfast
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Forgot to Count
Exercisin, though. My tummy looked preggo. It hurts to work it, but in a good way.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Calories?
Monday, May 16, 2011
Dizzy
Saturday, May 14, 2011
I don't know.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
900
Used: 32 + 145 + 24 + 6= 207
Net: 688
Weight: Wii says 130.3
I'm getting there. It's coming off. It's amazing.